THE GOATS  ***MOST IMPORTANT PAGE***

(pictures of all five are in the photos folder)

people always ask which goats are coming. every one has a reason.

--- BRENDA ---
eats ABSOLUTELY anything. fastest in the herd. brambles, scrub, the lot.
lot of ground + not much time = Brenda.
> cleared a patch by lunchtime once and then spent the entire afternoon
  staring at a chicken through a fence. neither of them moved. customer took
  a photo. its on my wall.

--- GARY ---
eats twice his share. CANNOT be trusted near a flower bed.
*** GARY DOES NOT GO TO A JOB WHERE ANYTHING IS GROWN ON PURPOSE ***
this is a rule not a preference and it cost me money.

  spring last year. Larkspur Cottage. Mrs Pennyworth.
  Gary ate her prize roses. ALL of them. she had them in a show the
  following weekend.
  I paid for new ones, drove them over, planted them myself, in the rain.
  Gary was not sorry.

so if anyone mentions vegetables, roses, anything with a little label stuck
in the soil next to it - Gary stays home and I tell them why. they find it
funnier than I did.

--- DUCHESS ---
the pretty one. will not touch nettles. not "would rather not". WILL NOT.
took her to a job that turned out to be mostly nettles. she looked at it.
looked at me. got back on the trailer. I drove her home and came back with
Kevin.
so - nettles in the ground, Duchess isnt on the list.

--- KEVIN ---
the ugly one. fears nothing on a steep bank. ground that makes me nervous
doesnt register with him at all.
last autumn he did the bank above the stream at Cobbs Farm. I wouldnt have
walked down it. customer filmed it on his phone. THREE people rang me that
month because of that video and every one of them said "is that the goat on
the cliff"
anything steep = Kevin.
he is also why I now carry a first aid kit. for me. not him.

--- MABEL ---
old. slow. never misses a patch.
Brenda does 4x the ground in a day. Mabel is the only one who properly
finishes a corner. fussy customer = Mabel, and I add a day.
shes on every job. people ask after her by name at christmas.

--- and the one thing they all did together ---
june. all five got into a caravan parked next to a job at Ferris Lane.
I do not know how. the door was shut when I left.
they ate a cushion, a road atlas and most of a curtain. Kevin was standing
on the table.
I paid for the curtain. customer said the atlas was out of date anyway.
>>> TRAILER GATE HAS TWO BOLTS NOW <<<